The Wonder Wander

01/28/2016

White House Press Release on FBI Investigation of Hillary Clinton

Filed under: Politics — Tom Malley @ 11:41 am

As the FBI investigation of HRC’s bootleg email system progresses, you can bet that White House Press Secretary Josh “Notzo” Earnest is drafting a press statement for the President to read when the investigation is forwarded to the Justice Department. While we have no way of knowing what will be in the final version, we can guess what some of the draft talking points look like at this stage:

With regard to the news that the FBI is forwarding the results of their investigation on former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to the Justice Department

  • I do not have all the facts of this matter since I just read about it in the newspaper this morning, just as you all did
  • I am shocked, just as you are, by the severity of these allegations
  • I am mad as hell that the FBI would release this report prior to the presidential election
  • As usual, the Justice Department will exercise due diligence in evaluating this report and bringing any charges that are warranted in this matter
  • White House staff will cooperate fully with the Justice Department to slow walk any further investigation and quash this report
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